Chapter 15

Charlotte was a little confused. She honestly felt that her heart was with Jeremy, but she didn't know what was going to happen there. She was in love with a married man. A man who was happy with his wife, regardless of how much they both wished that "wife" was Charlotte. She couldn't compete with that.

So when Terrance showed up, things for her got even worse. Terrance was the only man that she knew that could compete with Jeremy for her feelings. Had Terrance not been called to duty, she would've married him back then.

How thin was the line between loving someone and being in love with someone?

"Can I come in?" Terrance asked.

Charlotte was standing in the doorway staring at him. She shook her head out of the daze she was in and stepped aside as his six foot four frame waltzed into the room. She closed the door behind him and leaned against it.

She didn't know what to do or say. If they were still on the phone, it would've been easier, but given that he was here, now and in the flesh, it was throwing her off her game. This was something that she had to mentally prepare herself for.

"I'm sorry, have a seat," she said, motioning to the sofa in her living room.

"I was just about to, um, fix myself a drink. You want?" she asked. She knew she definitely needed something to stop herself from going crazy.

She walked over to the bar in the corner and pulled out two highball glasses. She filled them both halfway with Alize. Her bar, her rules, she thought. He knew she knew nothing about mixing drinks, let alone what went into which glass.

She handed him his drink and sat on the floor cushions lining the wall under the window. She chose sitting on her floor over sitting on the sofa any day. She purposefully had her entire house lined with the thickest carpet underlay she could find. When you walked on it, your feet would sink into the carpet.

"So..." she began, "what brings you out here?"

"I came to see you. I just got back yesterday, went to see my mom and dad last night, my Big Mama this morning and now you this evening. I didn't want to call and you maybe not be here. And I didn't want to call and you maybe be here and not want to see me. I just didn't know what to expect. I mean it’s been a couple of years, you know?"

"Three years, two months and four days, to be exact. But who's counting?"

She coyly took a sip of her drink and watched him over the rim. She noticed that he'd set his drink down and was intensely watching her.

“Why are you sitting way over there?” he questioned.

“I like it over here. Why don’t you come join me? I don’t bite.”

Terrance stood up and Charlotte looked up just in time to see that he was just about to walk into a cluster of small lights she had hanging over her reading chair.

“Watch your head!” she yelled.

He ducked, but not in time. He knocked one of the lights off and Charlotte caught it. She laughed as he looked like he was about to cry. He apologized as he tried to fold his long legs under him like she did. She cracked up even more as he tipped over trying to sit Indian style.

Once he got settled, they sat and comfortably talked for the next couple of hours. It was fun catching up with Terrance. He told her about the things he saw while he was away and she caught him up on what had been going on in her life.

She asked him if he’d met someone while he was away and he thought that was a strange question. She told him about how there were men that she knew who got called to duty and came back married or engaged to women from where ever they served. He denied having a wife or fiancée, claiming that he was still in love with her.

He then told her about the ring and how he would’ve proposed had things been different. He asked her if she was seeing someone now and she hesitated with her answer.

“It’s complicated. I’m in a situation that is not ideal and I have no idea how I’m going to handle it,” she told him.

That was one thing she always loved about him. She could tell him anything and he would sit and talk it through with her, no matter what it was about.

But this wasn’t something that she really wanted to share with Terrance. She wasn’t exactly sure that she wouldn’t come out hurt in the situation with Jeremy. She thought it would be best to keep her options open. After all, Jeremy was married. And right now, one of her options was sitting and talking with her in her living room.

Chapter 5

The next morning, Charlotte woke to her phone ringing. She turned over and looked at the clock first. 6:27 a.m.

“Whoever this is calling me this early better be dead,” she said out loud.

She clicked “talk” on her phone, not caring to look at the caller ID.

“Hello!” she barked into the phone. Whoever it was going to know right away that she was not happy having to wake up that early on a Saturday. She didn’t even have an event planned for that day.

“Hey, Char! Oh, did I wake you up? I’m sorry. I’m so used to getting up this early I didn’t even realize what time it was. I’m so sorry. Hey, I’ll let you go back to sleep. We can talk later,” the male voice spoke without stopping to let her get a word in.

But she didn’t care. It was Jeremy. He could wake her up any time, any where and any way he wanted to.

“Jeremy, slow down,” she said calmly, letting all the anger she had before she answered the phone melt away with the sound of his voice. “It’s okay, I needed to get up anyway. I have to, um, run an errand. Anyway, what’s up?”

“Oh, nothing much. I just wanted to call you, like I said I would yesterday, and see if we can hook up today, maybe grab a quick bite, and, you know, talk… and stuff.”

It sounded so cool in his head, he just didn’t think it came off that way vocally. “Get it together, Jeremy!!!” he scolded himself. Why was he acting like a lovesick kid again? This was just Charlotte. I used to talk to her about everything. I should be able to pick up right where I left off with her. I need to talk about Robin, my wife.

“I don’t want to talk about Robin,” he said, out loud. He stopped pouring the juice he putting in a cup for Mikey, shocked at what he’d just said. He didn’t mean to say it out loud, he just wanted to tell his conscience that.

“Okay, we don’t have to talk about her, not that we were, but it’s all good,” Charlotte said.

She couldn’t help but smile to herself. After all these years, the old Jeremy was still in there, and she could read the old Jeremy like a book. He was flustered, but she didn’t know why.

SHE was always the one with the crush, the one who said things out of place or who rambled on in the weirdest situations. SHE was the one that wanted to tell him so bad how she felt, but didn’t want to lose her best friend because he didn’t feel the same way. SHE was the one who loved him, and has loved him since the first day they met.

So what was wrong with him?

“I’m sorry, Lady. I don’t know why I said that. I have so much on my mind right now, I guess I was having a conversation with you as well as a conversation in my head. Can we strike all this and start over? I would love you forever.”

And then he said it. He used to tell her that all the time to get her to give in to him, to do whatever he asked of her. Most times, whatever it was, she would’ve done right off the bat. But there were times where she did need an incentive, and he found the right one.

Her hearing that did nothing for her mindset, though. Hearing that just pulled her back to all those times she had to watch him with another girl, a girl who wasn’t her. She didn’t want to keep doing that to herself, especially since the girl in this instance wasn’t just a girlfriend. He had a wife and he was happily married.

She needed to get over him.

“Jeremy, I have to tell you something.”

“Wow, it must really be serious for you to use my real name. What is it? I’m listening.”

Did she really want to do this like this, over the phone? That wouldn’t solve anything. No, she couldn’t do it like this.

“I think we shouldgo ahead and meet for lunch, today, to get this ten years in the making meeting out of the way."

She didn’t realize that she was holding her breath until she felt herself release it at his words.

“Cool, okay. That’s what’s up. I was thinking around noon? Lil Man should be back home by then and then I’m free for the whole day. Is that okay with you?”

She felt a wave of relief wash over her. He wasn’t going to push her about the serious tone she had. Maybe he didn’t catch it.

“Yeah, that works for me. Where?”

“Well, I think it should be somewhere in the middle of where we live. How about Meyerland Plaza. You’ve always loved La Madeleine. We can go eat there.”

“I can’t believe you remember that,” she said excitedly. “I can’t even get Damien to remember that.”

He felt like the wind was knocked out of him. Who is Damien, he wanted to ask.

“Wow! See, I knew there was a reason you were my best friend.”

She went on talking like nothing happened.

“Yeah. Okay, then. 11 am at La Madeleine. I can’t wait,” he said, changing the subject back to the matter at hand.

“Cool. I guess I’ll see you then. Later, Remy,” she said.

“Alright, ma, see you in a bit,” he said, hanging up the phone.

He didn’t want to get into who this Damien guy was because he didn’t want to get upset. He had no right getting upset, so it didn’t matter.

He couldn’t believe he never entertained the idea of her having a boyfriend, or even worse, a husband. He couldn’t remember that coming up in the conversation they had yesterday. That much, he wouldn’t forget.

But, it was only natural that she would be in a relationship, though. She was one who was never without one or two guys at a time. Now, don’t get her wrong, she was never a “cheater”, the guys knew that they weren’t exclusive, she just never gave any of them her undivided attention.

Except for Jeremy.

He started thinking back to the conversation they’d just had. He wondered what she really wanted to tell him because she knew what he said wasn’t really it. He figured whatever it was would come out eventually, hopefully sooner than later.

He had something to tell her, too. He prayed that she would be understanding to him having to get this off his chest, as well as he hoped he would be with her.

The only option would be to wait and see what happens. Today was the day…